Un vieux proverbe indien...

... dit que chacun d'entre nous est une maison de quatre pièces, une représente le physique, une l'émotionnel, une autre le mental et une dernière, le spirituel.  La plupart d'entre nous vivons dans une seule pièce le plus clair du temps mais à moins d'aller dans chaque pièce chaque jour, même si c'est seulement pour aérer, nous ne sommes pas complet.

Le tango vous fait passer dans chaque pièce, en dansant.

The myth of women competition or my Girrrrlfriends

Untrue to the stereotype that women in Tango seat alone waiting for men to ask them to dance, Tango has opened a whole new world of female friendship for me.  I am un-freaking-believably lucky to be surrounded by gorgeous, smart and vibrant women.  They're my girrrlfriends.  I love hanging out at the milonga when my peeps are there. Sometimes I actually regret dancing so much because I dont' get to talk with them enough... Such is the life of a wannabe tanguera. While some women keep to themselves and see other females as competition for dancers, we have built ourselves a supporting, loving community.

We look after each other, we enjoy watching each other dance, we comfort, encourage, compliment, advice. We sit, whisper, laugh, exchange notes on creepy leaders with wandering hands, confess of tango crushes on weird characters, compare shoes, coo at new dresses and overall forget for a few delightful minutes that we have careers, ventures, responsabilities or even children and beaus.

All of them are educated, smart, funny, sociable and really, really, and I mean really, good dancers. So, without further ado, let me introduce you to a few from my gang (note: all names are real, if you come our way one day you'll surely recognize them):

Tracey has this glow that makes you want to get real close to her just in case some of her dust fairy would rub off. Add to this that she is the most incredible Yoga instructor that I had the luck to meet in the past 12 years. If she were a step, she'd be one of Michelle Erdemsel's adornment, her trademark rond-de-jambes, feminine and hypnotic.

Sabrina is strong and supple, fun and simple.  She has the most incredible grey skirt that looks as if it was made just for her. She also has a gift for writing poetic Facebook updates, which is a rare gift, don't you think? She's an enrosque, so difficult to master and yet looking so easy and elegant.

To me, Daphné would be a boléo.  Maybe because we had some much trouble together trying to execute a decent one, perhaps because it's one of those basic moves that you think you master but actually keep on re-learning all the time.  Swing dancer, singer, pillar of one of our tango schools, she is the listener we all need, the no-nonsense pal we wished we'd listened to.  We sometimes go to the Milonga just to be in each other's company.

Diane has the smile of chocolate and she faintly smells of caramel (probably because she is a caramel entrepreneur).  Her leopard printed heels fit her like a glove and signal to all other animals trying to water down that the feline is here! More than a position, to me Diane personifies a warm abbrazzo.

Julie is one of those woman whom you could swear is a professional dancer but no, she is "just" a professional musician. She is also fun and lighthearted, sophisticated and natural at the same time (a tour de force if you ask me)....  definitely a colgada!

Nicole was probably the inspiration for several nude paintings but she refuses to acknowledge it. Her laugh is more infectious than the scarlet fever. When we sit together I think you can hear us laugh on the other side of the... country. More than one specific step, she is, in my eyes, the embodiement of Milonga.

When I describe Daniela to a newcomer I talk of her pearly white smile and bouncy black curls, her understated sexiness that hides the wisdom of an old lady intertwined with the freshness of a 20 years old.  According to her enamored husband, she is a loving, explosive ball of passion and,  for him still, she'd be an enganche.

I think flowing chiffon dresses were invented for Leila.  Everything about her is petite, except her brains and her heart. She has the resilience and the flexibility of the green reed. Her volcadas make her stand on air, suspended in time. 

I did not include many others: Astrid, delicate Nordic goddess; Hinda, fiery and talented choreographer, but also Mélanie, Chantal, the other Julie, Evelyne, Kasia, Caroline, Geneviève, Marie-Noël, Hélène, Mylène, .... and my brain just blew a fuse.  Why did I pick these first ones?  Only because I talked to them that night I got the idea for this post and because there is some unspoken rule about what's a decent length for such blurbs so I do have to stop here!

I don't care if I don't get good tandas, as long as I've seen my girls. I hope you have your girls (or your boys) too.

Happy dancing....

What kind do you like? Would fluffy do?

Would you be able to put into words what you want from the abrazo?  That's what Brigitta Winkler, who graced us with her presence a few days ago, got us pondering.  Her class (Milonguero Style) was magical but that's for another post.  She started by getting us into groups of four and exchanging verbally on what we expect from the embrace.  We chatted for a few minutes and then the whole class shared their insights.

I was amazed, but not surprised, that answers were vague at best and mostly not really targeting the question.  Most people talked about musicality, posture, axis, etc. but few were able to articulate what they expect from the abrazo.  Indeed, it is really difficult to put into words what the embrace means. Especially if you have not experienced it.

While we worry about technique, axis, steps, musicality and a whole string of things we can control, fix, improve, repeat, one thing we forget is the quality of our embrace.  How do we want to be held? Do we even know?  How do we hold?  Does that reflect who we are?  Do dancers keep asking us because they like how we hold them?  Can you be taught to embrace?

I have had the luck to dance with some of the best dancers on my continent and it wasn't the steps they managed to make me do, it wasn't how they put me at ease, their confidence, their poise, it was their embrace, that left a deep imprint on my soul.

After the first few minutes of dancing with Homer Ladas I just felt compelled to tell him: "Dancing with you is like dancing with water".  He had been told. Numerous times.  The first seconds I got into Tomas Howlin's arms almost brought me to tears. I felt like it was the first time a man was taking me into his arms.  No offense for the men in my life, it was just a sensation.  My regular partner makes me feel like I'm curling up on this couch: Vibrant but not flashy, classy but not classic, comfortable but not mushy.  Lucky me....

Other dancers have left others marks and I came to realize that the embrace is about who you are and your ability to communicate that to another.  Hesitations, lack of confidence, self-doubt are sure killers.  I have been working real hard on my embrace more than anything else.  Often with the help of fellow dancers but mostly with the help of yoga (and that's for another post too).

I got my reward a few days ago.  A leader told me in a middle of a tanda: "Dancing with you is like dancing with a fluffy pillow".  I enjoyed hearing that much like I take pleasure in a great pastry with a cup of Earl Grey.  I repeated it to whomever was willing to hear me and took infinite pleasure rolling the sounds off my tongue: "Fluffy. ..Pillow"...

However, I keep in mind that what Tango has giveth, it can taketh away and I can lose that quality anytime, anywhere with anyone....

So what do YOU expect, hope for, yearn for, even pray for, in the embrace?

Etiquette 101 - Navigation, back-leading and the stare from Hell.

I love this pic from Tango in your Eyes. 

There are indeed many faces to Tango and one of the most annoying is the Tango arrogant snob who's too good to bother with the line of dance and can't figure out that they're not alone dancing.

One word of warning: if I get bumped when we dance because you enjoy confronting other men, I will never dance with you again... and I am not the only one feeling that.... trust me on it.  Poor navigation skills is worse than poor technique or lack of connection. 

Surprisingly enough it is not always the beginner dancer who lacks navigation skills. Nope!  More often than not it is the idiota who's been dancing for years and looks down on the rest of us. 

Most festivals have classes on navigation and some schools here are starting with etiquette courses in the curriculum.  If you have not taken such class yet, TAKE ONE!  Trust me, no one is above it.

Navigation is not the sole job of leaders though.  As long as there will be idiotas doing anything and everything on the dance floor, followers will need to pitch in when it comes to navigating safely.  On a crowded milonga floor, navigation is team work.  It's not okay for followers to close our eyes and forget there are 50 couples around us.  I signal my partner with a light touch where danger is coming from behind him.  Now of course it needs to be done with some finesse.  One leader I've been dancing with calls it "back leading". I call it back-seat driving ;)

Anyways, I came a long way with that.  From being told that it was disruptive to now getting compliments about it. Pfew!  I have also developed a related skill:  the "Stare from Hell".  I know most leaders who are navigation-challenged in our community and when I spot one of them getting too close for comfort, I catch his eye and give him the "Stare from Hell." It works only 50% of the time as some just don't understand anything but it's often enough to cool off a few which lessens the workload for me.

I recognize that's something not everyone can do.  Years of teaching have endowed me with a natural authority and the ability to have grown men break into a sweat just by looking at them.  Thank God I have other stares in my knapsack, otherwise I'd be a very lonely tanguera :D

Happy dancing....

Tango mastercard

- Getting home from the milonga = 2am
- Showering and taking off make-up = 2:30am
- Soaking feet in ice water = 2:45am
- Eating a cranberry muffin 3am

Best night of your life: timeless

She summed it all up

"All I can say is every day that you wait to start tango, is another day you’ll regret not having started sooner." Mari on The Tango Blog

Pré-milonga 101 - Before the Milonga 101

Pour ceux qui débutent, la préparation pour les premières milongas peut paraître déroutante. Voici un petit guide rapide. Rajoutez vos étapes dans les commentaires

Étape 1- Salle de bain.
Douche chaude puis froide et on insiste bien sur les jambes et les pieds avec l'eau froide!
Deux rituels importants: les dents et le déo. Fil dentaire, brossage en règle et rince-bouche. J'ai 4 déos différents dans ma salle de bain, il m'arrive d'en changer avant même de sortir... Je sais, ça fait un peu obssessionnelle...

Ce que je regrette le plus, pas de parfum, ça peut en déranger certains. Désolant pour moi qui suis connu au bureau pour mon parfum.

Étape 2- Placard
Pas de couleur claires car la transpiration des hommes laissent de vilaines marques sur les chandails. Il faut du souple et du près du corps.
Si vous craigniez les marques de transpiration, on trouve des petits "pads" speciaux chez Pharmaprix et Jean Coutu. Il suffit de les coller à l'intérieur des vêtements et hop, ni vu ni connu! Juste pas oublier de les enlever avant de tout mettre au lavage.

Après il faut encore se coiffer, se maquiller... Il m'est arrivé quelques fois de ne pas aller danser juste parce que je n'avais pas le courage de passer une heure à me préparer.

Avec le temps j'ai réussi à réduire le temps de préparation de moitié, notamment en ajustant ma garde-robe et ne perdant plus des heures à trouver quelque chose qui me permette de danser confortablement.

Happy dancing...

Etiquette 101 - Codigos

Inspired from a post by Mari: "Trying to show a new move at a milonga is one of the most obvious marks of very poor dance etiquette."

I agree!!! Could we all agree to quit doing THAT?

Last Sunday I actually got scared as my partner (whom I had never danced before) lead me into a very deep volcada and then attempted to drag me across the floor! I wish the horror on my face had been recorded. He did that twice! So he's now on my little black list of "leaders who have little regards for their partner and prefer to show off than experience something genuine."

I don't mind trying new things but you have to be en expert leader to have a follower do new things at a milonga. I can count on the fingers of one hand the men I have danced with who managed to make me go "Wow! I did not know I could do that!"

Has that ever happened to you?

Dossier of a baby tanguera

*Désolée pour mes lecteurs français, exceptionnellement ce billet n'est pas traduit*

This is a little game that some in the blogher community have been playing. So if you are nice enough to pretend you're interested in me, keep reading. Otherwise, I kinda understand you have better things to do with your life....

You can also fill in the questionnaire yourself in the comments. You'll find explanations here and Tina Tango did her own too.


Name:
Steph (for most people)
Raphaël's sister (for anyone who dances tango)
Zazagabor (on blip.fm)
Professor (for those poor students who have been taught to confuse respect and ranking. No matter how many times you tell them to use your first name, some can't do it)

Looking Glass Powers:
The ability to laugh loud and clear
The ability to synthesize huge amounts of information and create half-ass theories on the fly
The ability to give others ideas on what to do with their life
The ability to see the bigger pictures while recklessly overlooking the details

Dress-up Closet: (signature items in my wardrobe)
White and red wrap dress, Vietnamese silk dresses (Ao Dai), Chinese silk Kimonos used as coats (if I could remember when I get out), yoga and running gear, more tango shoes than I can use in one night.

Disguise:
Red slutty tango dress and silver CiF. Black track suit with Mom.com T-shirt

Go-To Gadget:
Pink camera-phone, ancient iPod, USB keys, Anis de Flavigny

Vice:
White wine and anything with cachaça or rum or tequila.

Magic Potion:
Earl Grey with soy milk

Battery Recharge Hub:
Tracey's Asanara yoga class on Mondays at Ra'da. Studio Tango milongas.

Bratty Spoilers:
Watching Bolt with my son, and Pho

Owner's Manual: (What defines you in print, what illuminates you)
Anything by Maya Angelou. Belle du Seigneur by Cohen.

Weapon: (What is your tool, your device, your method)
Wit that goes straight for the balls! Natural defiance of social order. Optimism and energy.

Nemesis: (What are you up against, what challenges you)
People who hurt kids. Bikers on sidewalks. When my son blurts out clichés he heard in school. Beginner tango dancers who ask for "steps" or don't dare dancing during milongas. Tango snobs. My balance and my axis. Procrastination. Passive-agressiveness.

Secret Ambitions: (What would your six- year-old self say you should grow up to be)
Doing anything I feel like without thinking twice about it, staying fearless.

This is driving me crazy - Milonga Vs. Tango

So I get out of a Milonga class. Pablo Pugliese - yup, son of... and Noel Strazza -yup, ex-partner of Pablo Veron (Oh yeah baby, Montreal is one star-studded place, I tell ya) teaching. So not exactly average teachers who don't know squat about tango but think they can improvise themselves as such (yup, we also have a bunch of those here...). Anyways... Pablo and Noel ask us what is the difference between Tango and Milonga. We venture guesses and I (idiotically) say "rythm? tempo?" Some of you would have guessed the same right? Well it appears not so!

Then Pablo played Milonga del Angel which, indeed, is just so slow I always thought it was a tango (that just goes to show how much of a beginner I am...). He then explains that it's the melodic line behind that makes the difference, not faster rythm. Damn! The anal-retentive in me was unsatisfied with that answer and I started digging.

Now, mind you, that happened yesterday so I was not able to ask all my tango friends but I will do just that at tonight's milonga.

Meanwhile, I really need your help here. According to what you heard, read, seen, danced, what is the difference between a milonga and a tango? Leave your comments below and I'll agregate them in a post.

As food for thought here is what I found on the web (and that's very little)

(from this site)
"Chronologically both Tango and Milonga coincide. Both come from the black
dance Candombe, but while the Milonga is the dance from the compadritos
orilleros according to Vega and other writers of the time (1880-1900), Tango
is the preferred music by the urban compadritos. The most vivid difference
between the Tango and Milonga is the rhythm. The Milonga is faster and cut,
which gives way to dance it with cortes and quebradas. In this dance the man
shows up his abilities greatly and in second order does the woman. The Tango
is slower which also allows to be danced with cortes and quebradas but with
less frequency, and at a rhythm more adequate for dancers of less expertise.
The Tango allows both man and woman to show up their abilities equally
without differences of gender. The Milonga orillera was for the ones who
danced very well. On the other hand, the urban tango allowed dancers of
lesser dance skills or those called medio pataduras to participate in the
dance"

That actually just contradicts what Pablo said, I know and I'd be more tempted to believe him...

Here is something else:
"The Litmus Test is the rhythmic pattern.

Listen to the Habanera from Bizet's opera, Carmen. The habanera rhythm is identical to the rhythmic pattern of a milonga. However, a habanera is slow and a milonga is fast.

There's a historical connection between habanera and tango. Indeed, old tangos (the kind that people feel inclined to dance "canyengue" to) often use the same rhythm as the habanera.

Did you ever watch the old TV show "Dragnet"? The first part of the Dragnet theme is the same as the habanera rhythm. (DUM da DUM DUM) That might not mean anything without musical notation, but that "dotted" rhythm (it's called a dotted rhythm because of the symbols that are used to notate it) is repeated non-stop in a milonga.

Contrast that with a tango, which aligns more with 4 heavy beats per measure (we tend to walk on every other beat). This difference in feel is why people tend to like dancing traspie in a milonga. That DUM-da-DUM-DUM, DUM-da-DUM-DUM repetition lends well
to double time steps to accommodate the tiny "da".

Did that help? Or did that obscure things more? Listen to that Carmen aria."

This may hold the final explanation but I can't understand music stuff in English ( I learnt it in French...)

"Chicho"

Mariano "Chicho" Frumboli

Un des plus grand danseurs de notre époque. Le roi de l'improvisation.

Chicho est connue pour sa musicalité fantastique et son style unique qu'il a développé depuis plus de 10 ans. Sa technique incroyable et son oreille lui permettent de pouvoir improviser sur des oeuvres extrêmement complexes comme celles d'Astor Piazzolla. En voici un exemple.

Pour finir Chicho déchire sa race grave

Jaimalauxpiedsjaifaimjsuisfatiguemaiscestquandmemesympadetreici

Qu'a fait le tango pour vous? What has Tango done for you?

Pour certains
le tango guérit!

Pour d'autres c'est une leçon de vie

Et pour vous, pourquoi faites vous du tango? Qu'est-ce que le tango a changé dans votre vie, que vous a t-il appris?

*°°°°°*****°°°°°*°°°°°*****°°°°°*°°°°°*****°°°°°

For some
tango heals!

For others it is a life lesson

What about you? Why do you tango? What has Tango changed in your life? What has Tango taught you?

On a tous des modèles....

.... le mien, en tango, c'est mon frère Raphaël.

En deux ans il a réussi à se transformer en danseur de tango. En sortant tous les soirs, en essayant toutes les milongas, en dansant sans relâche, seul chez lui dans la journée, tard les soirs de semaine et de week-end dans les praticas. Il a commencé néo, et il est maintenant plus porté sur un style digne du Golden Age, à voir sur Youtube.

Un avantage majeur chez lui c'est son passé d'art martiaux et de gymnastique. Pour preuve, une vidéo faite par un de ses amis.

Raphaël contribuera de temps en temps à ce blogue suivant ses disponibilités. Son nom de scène: Jaimalauxpiedsjaifaimjsuisfatiguemaiscestquandmemesympadetreici

Hmmmmm......

L'obsession des souliers

Mon amie Daphné vient se s'offrir une superbe paire de GretaFlora, quelques semaines seulement après sa première paire de CommeIlFaut. Vous voulez vous rincer l'oeil avec quelques modèles GretaFlora....?

Il semblerait que l'innovation ne soir pas morte du côté des chaussures de danse made in B.A. Voyez le billet de SallyCat sur les 2X4.

Mes bébés **--** My babies

Deux paires de Néo-Tango et trois paires de Comme Il Faut. 18 mois de danse.

Bebé en camino

Quand on me demande quel est mon niveau en tango j'ai souvent envie de répondre: je suis un bébé tango en chemin... mais pour des nord-américains ça ne veut rien dire.

Certains jours j'ai envie de répondre: aujourd'hui mon niveau est en dessous de 0 car je suis fatiguée, j'ai mal aux pieds, etc. Un autre jour je pourrais dire que mon niveau n'est pas si mauvais car je viens juste de danser avec un homme qui au lieu de faire du sport ou d'enchaîner des pas s'est préoccupé de notre danse (oui, ça arrive).

J'ai aussi définitivement arrêté de demander "Tu danses depuis combien de temps?" Au fil des milongas, je me suis rendue compte que les années ne veulent rien dire. J'ai dansé avec des hommes qui en faisait depuis quelques mois et qui sont sur leur axe (et non pas sur le mien...), qui sont attentifs et musicaux. J'ai aussi dansé avec des hommes qui dansent depuis plus de dix ans et c'est une catastrophe. Ce sont les pires danseurs car ils sont persuadés qu'ils sont bons et sont incapables d'apprendre et de changer.

Être un bébé en chemin, c'est pas si mal. J'ai encore tellement à comprendre, ressentir et accomplir, c'est grisant.

Et vous, vous répondez quoi quand on vous demande votre "niveau"?

*********-------------**********

When asked what my level in tango is, I often want to answer: I am a tango baby on the way ... but for North Americans, that means nothing.

Some days I want to say that my level is below 0 because I'm tired, I have sore feet, etc.. On other days I could say that my level is not so bad because I just danced with a man who, instead of doing sport or steps, was more concerned about our dance (yes, it happens) .

I have definitely stopped asking "You have danced for how long?" After many milongas I came to realize that the years mean nothing. I danced with men who started tango a few months before and they are on their axis (not mine ...), they are responsive and musical. I also danced with men who've danced for over ten years and dancing with them is a disaster. These are the worst dancers because they are convinced they are good and are therefore unable to learn and change.

Being a baby on the way, is not so bad. I still have so much to understand, feel and achieve, it is exhilarating.

What about you, how do you respond when asked about your "level"?

SallyCat

Been reading and watching SallyCat.

Don't miss her inspiring and emotional piece on learning to deal with cultural divides.

Sometimes I feel like Tango is a pair of expensive designer brand new shoes: so uncomfortable at first even though you pay dearly for them but as you wear them your body shapes the leather and it becomes the most comfortable shoes you own.

**************------------------***************
Ça fait un moment que je suis SallyCat.

Ne manquez pas son billet inspirant et plein d'émotion sur l'apprentissage des clivages culturels.

Parfois, j'ai le sentiment que le Tango c'est comme une paire de nouvelles chaussures de marque : on est mal à l'aise au début, alors qu'on a payé cher, mais au fur et a mesure qu'on les porte, elles se forment à notre corps et deviennent les chaussures les plus confortables qu'on ai jamais eu.

Ochos pour femme

On ne travaille jamais assez ses ochos. C'est une des premières choses qu'on apprend et on doit perpétuellement les redécouvrir. Combien de fois, en sortant d'un cours je me suis dit: "Oye! je croyais que je savais faire mes ochos..."

Voilà en quelques secondes une leçon de ochos... mais c'est aussi presque 6 minutes de bonheur à regarder danser un prof argentin et son étudiante anglaise.

Et elle a des souliers à mourir.....

Une autre leçon de ochos avec Jennifer Bratt

On devrait pas avoir le droit d'appeler ça du tango

Non, sans rire, ça me fait grincer les dents:
la Tango Maureen de RENT
Le tango des assassins. Brad et Angelina savent faire des tas de choses mais pas danser.
La médaille va au tango de Roxanne du Moulin Rouge, gross.

Et enfin, pour rire: une satire avec El Choclo,

My Daisy Dukes

Remember Daisy Dukes in Dukes of Hazard... Comme il faut achetées chez Mylène été 2008. Hélas, le tissu ça tient pas bien le pied... Je les mets très rarement.

Les argentées

Achetées chez Mylène été 2008. Jamais eu une ampoule, elles sont parfaites.